Schweddy Balls - Thank You Ben and Jerry's!

http://www.benjerry.com/flavors/feature/schweddy/

Basketball, Sex, and Lots of Babies!

Brandon Davies - Suspended from the BYU basketball team for having pre-marital sex.  That is a total shame.  How is he going to be NBA eligible unless he starts fathering kids today?
Shawn Kemp - Allegedly has 11 kids with 9 different women.  Also, he did NOT attend BYU.

Mini on a Mini for a Mini

A man in Germany wins a Mini Cooper by tattooing the word "Mini" on his junk.  How did YOU get your Mini Cooper?

Is that Seamen and Blood You're Wearing?

As if a dress made of REAL MEAT isn't enough.  Lady Gaga is developing a new perfume.  She has requested the developers to make it smell like seamen and blood.  They mentioned on SNL that the perfume should be called Hotel Mattress.

Football and PORN! OH YEAH!!!

Too good to be true.  Here is the info from XXXChurch's website:  This is the chance to bring hope to those who are struggling with pornography. For some it is ludicrous to link three X's with church and for others it is long overdue. The one undeniable truth that can't be ignored is the blatant push for all things sexual in our society. Porn Sunday seeks to drive the conversation about pornography into our churches, families and lives. This weekend service brings healing to those sitting in churches who are caught up in pornography.
More than 300 churches from all over the U.S. are participating.
The churches will play a 40-minute video simulcast featuring Jon Kitna, Matt Hasselbeck, Ryan Pickett, Josh McCown and a few other NFL players and founder of XXXchurch, Craig Gross. The video will be available to watch on the website on Sunday, Feb 6th all day.
The goal for the event is to get churches talking about the "elephant in the pew" and get people help that are struggling with porn and sex addiction.

Charlie Sheen, are you listening?  And by the way, that's not an elephant in the pew, that's a pornstar!

So You Think You Can Party?

If you think YOU can party.  Think again.  Charlie Sheen was hospitalized recently for "abdominal pain".  After smoking a briefcase full of cocaine with 5 hookers and/or pornstars and shelling out thousands of dollars for said pornstar sex, Sheen checked himself into rehab......AT HIS OWN HOUSE!  That should work out fine.   ORDER ME UP MORE DRUGS AND WHORES!......RIGHT FREAKIN' NOW.  THIS REHAB STUFF IS KILLING ME!

State of the Union

Striking the new civil tone in Washington, Sarah Palin reportedly said while making this hand and mouth gesture, "I'll take all three dicks AT THE SAME TIME!"  And that is precisely why our country is heading in the right direction.  One with a very happy ending.

Where's the Beef? At?

WHERE'S THE BEEF?!?!

Apparently not at Taco Bell.  Reports yesterday allege Taco Bell beef is only about 36% beef.  Do we really care what it is?  Especially after a heavy night of drinking?  It's delicious!  And that's all people care about. 

Things that Look Like Vaginas

This is a picture of someone's vocal folds.  Get your mind out of the gutter sickos!

Captain Awesome......AWESOME!!!

EUGENE, Ore. -- An Oregon man's new name is getting a lot of attention. An unemployed cabinet maker legally changed his name to Captain Awesome.


Awesome was born as Doug Smith Junior. He said he wanted a name a little more unique.

A judge approved Captain Awesome's new name. Mr. Awesome even works as an ordained minister on the side.

It does not really matter how you spell his new name. His official signature are two arrows pointing to a smiley face from the left and the right.